Friday, April 19, 2013

Love & Marriage Series: Keeping Things Interesting

Linking up again for the Love & Marriage Series. You can visit Mix and Match Family to see the other links!

Today's topic is about keeping your marriage interesting. This is something that can definitely be difficult to do. If you do not have kids you can pretty much do anything when you want - at least what I recall :). After having children my life has become all about my kids. Sometimes it is so easy to forget that your husband is there with you as a partner and he can quickly move into the category of roommate that helps maintain the kids and household. Now, obviously we have a newborn that is not even 3 weeks old yet, so our current life revolves around Harrison's needs, but we still have to find ways to regroup and connect as a husband and wife. Below are different ways we "try" to make our marriage a priority.

Date nights. Ok, so this has been a major fail recently, but our thought process was in the right place! John and I had set to go on a date at least once a month. Seems pretty easy, but it just kept getting pushed to the side as other things in life made their way in. Our plan was at least dinner at a new place each time. We started this in 2011 and I think we managed about 3-4 dates :( 

Parent only vacations. I can think of a couple vacations we have taken together without Heidi. Puerto Rico and Vegas. This one is very difficult for me. Each time we leave for some sort of vacation {it happened when I went on my girl's trip too} I assume I am going to die or something horrible is going to happen. It is hard to leave my babies {well, so far we have just left Heidi because obviously we have not planned a vacation since Harrison has joined us} and it is hard to do things without them. Luckily my parents live very close and I am comfortable with Heidi staying there for a few nights.

Home nights. After the kids are asleep just hang out and talk. John and I have rarely gotten to have these nights lately because I am usually just so exhausted by the end of the day that I go to sleep when Heidi goes to sleep. They are starting to happen a little more now that I am not pregnant and Heidi has been going to bed so much faster now that she refuses to nap. John and I have TV shows that we enjoy watching together, so that is our home activity.

We are still learning what to do to make time for each other. Heidi is such a mama's girl and of course breastfeeding a newborn can be very demanding in the early stages so sometimes I know I am guilty of putting my husband last. It is not intentional, but it is hard to be everything to everyone sometimes, you know? When you are a working mom anything that takes you away from your kids during non-working hours can leave you feeling sad and guilty - even though you need some time for yourself and time with your husband. My prayer is that I will not have to split my time like that anymore and therefore no guilt when John and I need to have a date or time together.

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