Monday, February 25, 2013

Blue Polish

Maybe it is just me, but I have given a timeline to most events that should happen in life. Not so much a timeline, but I have ages in which I have set for certain things to happen. Most of the ages I set for myself have been thrown out the window; thanks God for teaching me I am not in control! In regards to Heidi I have a mental list of ages on when certain things were/are supposed to happen. Things like getting her ears pierced, wearing make-up, shaving, mani/pedis, and all of those fun things. There are little "rules" I have in terms of what Heidi is allowed to wear or do when it comes to "mommy things" that Heidi wants to do.

As I have watched Heidi grow and learn and I see all of the passion and enjoyment she has for life a few of my "rules" have been thrown out the window. There was never a fight nor a battle of wills, but I have loved how Heidi responds to the things that may seem trivial to most people, but to myself and her it is such a big deal.

One set of rules was all about nail polish - color and salons. The color always had to be something very light and hardly noticeable  I wanted to wait longer, but I remember going on a trip and thinking I was going to die {which is usually how I feel when I am about to take a trip without my family} and I was determined that I would be the first one she was allowed to experience using nail polish. I get myself so worked up that someone is going to steal one of Heidi's firsts that I it upsets me to the verge of a panic attack. I know I say I am not crazy all of the time, and I am not, but I already have arguments planned out if someone steals one of the precious memories I have been looking forward to as a mom. Ok, so maybe that is a little crazy, and selfish, but I don't want to miss a single moment.

Back to the polish. The first time I painted Heidi's nails {toes and hands} was in March of 2012 right before I went to San Francisco for my fabulous girl's weekend. I used this little pale pink that you could see the color, but it was not noticeable  Heidi was super excited and we did this similar act many times. I think she might have even painted another member of our family's toes....

For Christmas John and I bought her a little set of nail polish which was glittery and "colored" but really it all seemed to go on clear and eventually would peel off throughout the day. Each morning and night for over a month Heidi would paint her finger and toe nails. It was the best gift ever for her. That was to be the extent of Heidi and her experience with nail polish. No bright colors until she reached a certain age and no salons until she was like 5 or so. The salon trip would have been for either a wedding or maybe for that magical 5th birthday. The details were not set in stone - just things I had thought about.

This week has been a little rough with being sick, stressed, and what I would like to refer to as "the last time I ever want to see these numbers on a scale - ever". I have been in desperate need for a pedicure and it was not going to happen without going somewhere to have it done. I needed the full shebang  not just a color change. I very much dislike wearing any sort of shoe that I cannot slip on without bending much less bend to paint my nails. With all of that I decided to throw in the towel on the salon idea and let Heidi go to have her nails painted as well. It was necessary if I were to have that deluxe pedicure I had been dreaming about all week.

We arrive at the place and there my little 2 and a half year old girl stood with eyes wide open at all of the color choices. I chose some maroon type color and Heidi instantly made her choice - blue. Not light blue or a muted blue, but bright electric blue. I almost hesitated, but I was so close to sitting and having a little relaxing moment that she could have chosen any color in the world and I would have been totally fine. It was also really close to lunchtime so I my hunger might have stopped me from caring too much as well.

The place had a cute little kids chair {and looking at the pictures now it is actually creepy} for Heidi and a nice mama sized one for me. I could not believe what transformed into my eyes. If any of you have seen Heidi with me {especially in strange places} you know that Heidi does not leave my side for a second. Heidi is glued to me. Well, not this time. I put Heidi in the little bear chair and then went and sat in mine and she sat there - no fighting to come to my lap. I seriously could not believe it. Then, even more amazing, she actually sat there {trying not to smile of course} and let some strange woman with a strange language touch her feet and hands. Honestly I never thought this would happen. The scene that played in my head was much more dramatic - like me leaving barefoot with only one foot having been massaged or both feet wet.

It was definitely a moment I will not forget. I hope that Heidi will always remember it too. I guess the reason I have so many "rules" is because I want Heidi to remember what it was like to do something for the first time. There are so many firsts that are important in a little girls life and I want them to be special. I liken it all to the Disney argument. Do you take them when they are really little and can experience with such an amazing innocence that cannot even be falsified or do you wait until they are older and can "truly experience" Disney? I am kind of learning that the younger they are the more they will "truly experience" things because they are not held back by caring what the world thinks.

1 comment:

Cecilia said...

I get it! HK was in the NICU for almost a month and I cried because a nurse dressed her for the first time (I'm pretty sure she thought I was crazy). if I'm honest, it still makes me irritated because it's a first that can't be repeated.

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