I have joined a group of women in reading a book titled In Faithfulness: He Afflicted Me by Lynette Kraft (to visit her blog click here). In this group Holly, the creator, asks questions from the book and we answer using our own life examples of how we felt.
I am late in joining in this group because I went on vacation for a week and didn't have the book yet. The book arrived at my house while I was away. So - I have a little bit of catching up to do! The first part given to discuss was the Introduction and Prologue.
Do you have a funny experience to share? What are some of the silly or stupid things you did? None...John and I haven't had a chance to, yet.
Has there been a time in your life that you felt the world was falling apart?
For sure - January our little Hudson died, March I lost my job.....you could say I was thinking, "what next, what next". I lived waiting for the next thing to happen...
Has God ever worked a miracle in your life or in the life of someone you know?
I have read of plenty of miracles, but as far as experiencing any firsthand I can't say that I remember any at the moment...maybe the time when I was 7 I was hit in the head with a metal baseball bat and had it been a hair to the left I would have died or a hair to the right I would have been blinded.
How has difficult times affected your marriage?
What John and I have experienced has only made us stronger. I cannot remember the last fight or argument we really had - one with meaning. Yes, of course there are little spats and disagreements, but not over anything important. Then again, our sense of importance has changed the past few months as well.
What fears have you struggled with?
I always had a fear of when it was about to be my time for children. I have always sensed that I would have difficulty in having children - my intuition kicking in. My biggest fear was losing a child and now my biggest fear is going through everything again. The question I ask myself is "will I ever having a living child outside of my womb?". It has already happened once and I am told by many people that it can't happen to me again, it just can't. The truth is I know it can - it happened once therefore it can happen again.
Do you feel that God has a plan for your life?
Yes - what the plan is I have no idea. I guess you could say I am just living by faith and trusting in God. I used to have a plan for everything. Before even getting pregnant I had my list of people to send baby announcements. I don't like to go into something without having a plan for something. Now? I just live and try to plan for a few vacations here and there =)
What has been the hardest moment of your life so far?
I would have to say moments - seeing my lifeless child on the tv screen, giving birth to a child I would not get to know this side of Heaven, burying my child and leaving him alone in a cold cemetery....