Attitude

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.

~Winston Churchill

Have you ever thought about the thoughts that run through your mind each day? I did this week and it put me in such a horrible mood. There are some things in life that I am really having a hard time dealing with. One major problem is ending sentences with prepositions, but not one that I am going to try and fix right at the moment. I feel like I am letting my thoughts/opinions about others and their actions take control over my attitude. Does that make sense? I become angry for no reason. The anger is in my head only - never at a person. For instance, people constantly complaining about not having money and then they are talking about vacations they are going on or things they got for Christmas. Another is people "listening" to you and then going on to compare their life with yours when it is really like comparing apples to oranges. Other times its when people offer to do something for you and its only on their time and not when you are ready. Its hard to explain without telling full stories. Regardless I have been letting the attitudes of others and how they handle things influence my attitude. The past few days I have been going about my own business and I have stopped worrying about how others are living their lives and my annoyances with them. I have found myself to be a much happier person in doing this.

Another thing I really have a hard time with (and sorry if this hurts anyone's feelings - please do not take it personally) is children that were born after Hudson and before Heidi. I sometimes feel so jealous because I was there first, but yet I am last. Hudson would have been born first and I would be the one to know what to do first and I would not have to ask things to them. They would have been asking me. It really shouldn't matter, but it does. It doesn't make me not like the children, it just makes me sad and I don't like being sad. I should have a two year old, but I don't and that is still such a harsh reality that I don't think people understand.

Follow or not

Today I thought - "hmm..I need to write a blog post today - about something, anything". It seems as if whenever I have a chance to write I never have anything in my head, but when I have everything in my head I never have a chance to write! So I went onto the Blog Frog to see if there were any fun "blog hops" to link up to with great ideas on blog posts. Every single hop was about trying to get more followers. It kind of makes me wonder why people are always wanting more followers. Sure its pretty fun to see a group of people that read what you have to say, but if your blog was a truly interesting blog wouldn't that create a following for you in itself? I guess not and maybe that's why people post their blogs onto hops in order to have people visit over to their blogs. I'm sure its great to have such a large following out there, but really I think I would definitely fail miserably with feeling like I continually needed to write something or do something cool and creative to keep my audience happy. I like my little circle of readers and friends I have now :)

Its so crazy how many different, yet similar, blogs there are out there. It made me think about when I really became involved in blogging. For awhile I blogged and no one even knew I had one and then, after Hudson, is when I publicized my blog. It was so much easier to write how I was feeling rather than talk about it. Of course, like most personal/family blogs, mine has transformed back into what it originally started out as - a family journal and way for out of town family to see what we're up to. It always has been that, but I guess at some point it turned into something more and something with more substance.